Hidden
by moonlitcat
Summary: Harry is done. Done with the Expectations, done with the fame , done with the manipulations, and especially done with the abuse. He is gonna disappear. When he comes back he takes the name Esmeralda Black and *she* will take the Wizarding world by storm. Chapter 7 up
1. New chapter 1

+*+HIDDEN*+*

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or Its characters. That honor belongs to J.K. Rowling.

Warnings: there will be talk of abuse and rape. Also this will be a snarry and there will be cross-dressing. If you don't like still read. I want your opinions. Harry will be 16 when he hooks up with Severus.

+*+…..…..*+*

"**BOY!" ** A screech echoed throughout the house of number 4 Private Drive. "GET** YOUR ASS DOWN HERE AND COOK BREAKFAST."** The banshee currently screaming was none other than Petunia Dursley. Sister to Lily Potter and aunt to Harry Potter. Or freak, or boy, or any other demeaning name known to man. She was cruel and loved to cause pain to any who fall short of her views on the world.

People like Harry himself.

Harry was awake and sat bleeding on his bed. He had no hope and his thoughts were filled with nothing but survival. He was little more than an animal. Living, day to day, for any type of food and drink. He even lived in his own waste and other bodily fluids. That woman's scream echoed in Harry's head as he tried to get himself out of bed. Kinda hard, when he was neck deep in depression and pain.

His godfather had just died and for the first time since his third year summer, he was FREAK. He was not Harry Potter, The-Boy-Who-Lived. He was the personal toy, servant of the Dursley's household. And the state of his body showed that.

His ebony locks were overgrown and dull. It was matted and full of un-nameable substances. He had multiple broken bones and bruises from the beatings of his Uncle and Cousin. Whip marks covered Harry's back, privates, chest, and thighs. Words were carved into his chest; whore, freak, murderer. Burn marks covered his arms and hands; punishment for imagined crimes against food.

Worse than the torturous beatings and burnings was when he was asked to clean himself off. Then the real punishment began.

+*+….*+*

Harry was just finishing lunch when his Aunt came into the kitchen. "Freak! Wash and clean yourself." She sneered as she went to leave. "Be down in the basement in 3 hours." With that she was gone.

Harry felt fear course through his body. _Please no._ he was whimpering quietly in his mind, desperate to not have this happen again. Having no choice, though, Harry went to wash up. Scrubbing the filth off of his body Harry felt the familiar numbness start to creep over his mind. He worked automatically. Following steps long since practiced.

Once he was done he looked in the mirror. Harry was disgusted by what he saw. His hair limply fell down to his shoulders. Bruises covered his face in a terrifying array of black, blue, purple, and yellow. Clothes way too big for him hung off his malnourished body like the shin of an old pug. Worse though were the barley healed scabs on his wrists and ankles. A testament to what he was living through.

Looking at the time, Harry noticed that he had less than 10 minutes to get into the basement.

Walking down the hall, Harry felt shame creep upon him. He could do nothing to stop this. His wandless magic made useless by the wards around the house. And he had been trained since he was five not to question orders or tell what was happening. Not even five years at Hogwarts could change that. It had been programmed into him, and he could only silently scream for help.

The basement was plain and separated into to sides. On side had a concrete floor and was filled with boxes the other had white tiles, a bed with no covers, and a big metal box by the wall. The memories of passed pain and shame seemed to seep out of the walls. Passed echoes of screams and whimpering filled the room. The horror imprinted in the vary walls of the room.

Harry walked to the bed and kneeled down next to it face down, pointing to the door. He waited with dread for his Uncle to return. He didn't have to wait long.

+*+….**RAPE SCENE**...*+*

Vernon Dursleys was slowly losing his mind. He had, unknowingly, managed to partake in the vilest of deeds. The raping of a wizard child, the stealing of innocence, he had cursed himself to a life of torment. So it was that this deranged and cursed man walked to the kneeling figure of his nephew. Slowly he lumbered across the room. Reveling in the fear and disappear evident on Harry's pale face.

"Strip." The Vernon's voice was deep with anticipation for what was to come. He hungered for it, for the knowledge that he was more powerful, that he was above he child that Vernon had tortured all Harry's life. He watched with eager eyes as harry slowly started to relieve him of clothes. The sight of his shaking scar covered form exited him as each piece of cloth was removed.

Shame. Fear. Acceptance. These feeling spun about in Harry's mind as he followed the commands of his uncle. "Get on the bed and kneel with your ass in the air like the slut you are."Positioning himself, Harry prepared for the pain that always came. He heard the rustling of cloth behind him as Vernon got rid of his own clothes.

The bed dipped as the man's large form crawled behind him. Fingers roughly pushed themselves into his opening. "Do you like that slut?" the fingers, three of them, twisted and tuned, forced in and out as his Uncle tried to find his prostrate. The minute the nerves inside of him were touched Harry screamed and groaned out in pleasure and shame.

His uncle was going to make his body enjoy this.

A few seconds later and the fingers were removed. Harry forced himself not to tense up in the hopes of relieving some of the pain. Without any warning Vernon quickly seated himself in Harry's arse. Without waiting he started to thrust in and out. The pain filled every nerve ending. No screams left Harry's lips. Only whimpers and groans that could easily be mistaken for pleasure.

As Vernon neared completion he roughly pulled on Harry's cock; forcing him to come. Three thrusts later and he had emptied his load inside of Harry's abused Body.

Slowly dressing Vernon left Harry bleeding and broken on the bed.

+*+…**END RAPE**…*+*

Harry lay in bed and slowly allowed his mind to return. He couldn't help but remember how he came to be here. The pain of how he was doomed to this hell. Harry cursed with all his might as pain filled his mind and heart.

+*+…FLASHBACK…..+*+

_As Harry arrived in Dumbledore's office his knees buckled underneath him. Looking around he saw that everything was how he'd remembered it. Yet now everything was different. _**Sirius was dead**._Harry bowed his head under the wave of guilt and anguish that threatened to over p _

_The loneness that welled up as he sat on the floor in the silent office was stifling. The __stillness was only broken by Fawkes's silent breathing._

_Suddenly as if a dam broke Harry was crying. His sobs cut through the silence like a sharpened knife. His body shuddered and shook as, for the first time, he cried for his life and what he went through. The loss of his parents, the abuse and neglect of his guardians, the lies, the manipulations, and the worlds need to dump its problems on a 15 year old boy._

_It was as he was hit be the unfairness of this that he relised it was all someone else's fault. How was he supposed to know that Voldemort could send false images to his mind? Snape should have told him. He also should not have to live with the world on his shoulders. Also he could get out of the abuse if he told someone. Right?_

_At this moment he knew something had changed. He no longer felt the guilt. Harry knew what his part in Sirius's death was, but the burden had lessoned. He felt that he could grieve in peace. Yes his actions led to Sirius's death, but they where not the whole cause. He can accept that and move on._

_At this moment the fire flared green and out of the fireplace stepped Dumbledore. When the older man looked at Harry there was a cold emotionless look on his face._

"_Get up boy" Dumbledore's voice was like Steel. Harry hastened to comply confused. _**Why does Dumbledore sound like that?**_ "That was such a __**stupid**__ thing you did boy. Do you know what you could've done! Years of work, out the window. You where ten seconds from ruining everything."_

"_But it was not my fault!" Harry intervened. _

"_It was your fault. You can't be doing stuff like that" Dumbledore suddenly pointed his wand at his penseive. A figured appeared on the surface and said….._

"The one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord approaches. … Born to those who have thrice defied him, born as the seventh month dies … and the Dark Lord will mark him as his equal, but he will have power the Dark Lord knows not … and either must die at the hand of the other for neither can live while the other survives. … The one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord will be born as the seventh month dies…" (Page 841 "Harry potter and the Order of the Phoenix")

_You are the one who must defeat the Dark Lord! Do you understand? You can't be rushing off to save people who don't matter in the war to come. Your one priority is to keep yourself safe." Dumbledore was literally spitting at the end of his speech_

**No. Why was he doing this? Wait at least now I can get out of the Dursleys. **_Harry looked strait at Dumbledore and said" well if you want me safe then I shouldn't go to the Dursleys. They abuse and neglect me. I'm not safe there."_

_Dumbledore stared at harry for a few seconds then burst out laughing" oh I know they do. I'm the most powerful wizard alive, how could I not know. A little discipline and hardships aren't that bad. Learn to grow up."_

_Harry felt crushed. If Dumbledore, a man he thought of as a mentor and grandfather didn't care for him, who would?_

*+*…END FLASHBACK…+*+

Harry had made Hedwig stay at Hagrid's hut and was sent to his relatives'. Two days later Dumbledore sent a letter to his relatives' informing him of Sirius's death. That night the torture began. Since then Harry had been alone in hell. Forced to become a slave to ignorant and filthy humans.

He was nearing his limit, the pain was becoming to much and some thing needed to change.

_That's it. I'm done, fed up. As far as I'm concerned the world could go fuck itself and find a new savior_. It only took a minute to decide what to do.

Harry was furious, how could he not be, this was the final straw. If he really mattered so little, then he didn't need to be there anyways.

Quietly and slowly, careful and mindful of his hurts, Harry got out of bed and dressed. His uncle had forgotten to look the door so Harry was able to leave. He walked to the cupboard and removed a pouch from inside his trunk. The pouch could be pulled over his head and was an able to fit anything while still feeling weightless. In it was his wand, cloak, photo album, two sacks of both muggle and wizarding money, and his books.

He left though the back door. Focusing hard on his thoughts Harry changed into a black and emerald storm phoenix. He had discovered in his third year that he was a multi-animagus and that he could use wandless magic. And tonight that ability helped to escape his prison.

Flying on silent wings Harry Potter, The-Boy-Who-Lived, Savior, and Chosen one, escaped with. None the wiser.

TBC

(AN: soo how was it.)


	2. New chapter 2

+*+HIDDEN*+*

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or Its characters. That honor belongs to J.K. Rowling.

Warnings: there will be talk of abuse and rape. Also this will be a snarry and there will be cross-dressing. If you don't like still read. I want your opinions. Harry will be 16 when he hooks up with Severus.

+*+…...ONE WEEK LATER…+*+

In a family run bed n' breakfast, Harry woke up gasping and screaming, having just witnessed one Voldemort's torture sessions. A little after his 15th birthday Harry started to feel every curse done by Voldemort. The worse was the Avada Kedavra which felt like millions of crucios as the soul is ripped from the body. It soon got to be that whenever a death eater is summoned, Harry knew and felt it.

It seemed he found out that Harry was no longer under protection. And if the dear moldy-wart knows then so does Dumbledore.

_I'll have to step up my plans for how to disappear. I need a way to move around unrecognizable. _Harry pondered his problem. _Well I can't go into the wizarding world like this. So my disguise would have to be muggle. Defiantly I need some new clothes. I guess I'll find out where to go from there._

Harry got up out of bed and made his way slowly to the bathroom. Looking into the mirror Harry studied his appearance. Over the past week, Harry had been repairing the damage done to his body. All signs of abuse where gone due to potions and his healing magic. Most scars were gone save for the lash marks and curse scars. His hair, with the help of magic, has grown to be about waist length, and fell with soft waves down his back. He had a slender and lithe body and an aristocratic face from his father which was softened by his mother's features. Mainly the eyes, nose, and lips. And his eyes, which he fixed with a combination of charms and potions, burned like fiery emeralds.

As Harry readied himself for the day, he wondered at the turn his life is making. He was finally free; free to live, love, and make his own decisions.

**+*+****…...****SNAPE'S POV…****…..****...+*+**

Severus Snape was not happy. Two days ago when the Weasley twins went to go check up on Potter they found him missing. After alerting the Order a full blown manhunt was insured. Everyone pitched in, in the hopes of finding the brat.

Now as the onyxes eyed man limped down the corridors of Hogwarts he cursed Dumbledore, The Dark Lord, and HARRY POTTER. He'd just returned from the worst torture session this year. And that includes the man's displeasure of losing the Prophecy.

"Damn brat. Can't just stay where he belongs. Making trouble with foolish ….foolishness" Snape murmured and mumbled that and more all the way to his quarters.

+*+….HARRY'S POV…+*+

Harry walked into the muggle clothes store and waited for the lady to get finished with her costumers. He was at a store called 'Worlds Choice' a multi style clothes store. It had everything from the trendy to the gothic, for both genders.

_This place has bound to have a style I can use. I mean there are already tons of styles._

"Hello how may I help you?" a voice broke through his musings. Turning around harry came face to face with a woman maybe three years older than him. She had short pixie cut strawberry blonde hair and a delicate figure. Her looks contrasted with the gothic look she was sporting.

"Um…. Well I need a new look. I don't want anyone to be able to recognize me. I want to be someone new" Harry told her. The girl looked him over from head to toe. Suddenly her face lit up and she let out a sequel.

"Yes, finally I get someone who would actually look good in my clothe designs!" she grabbed his hand and dragged him to a back room. "Ok now don't freak but here."

Harry looked at the clothes she wanted to show him, and nearly passed out. Dresses, blouses, skirts, panties, bras, and other majorly female merchandise is what he saw. "You know I'm a guy, right?" His voice sounded high and squeaky.

She laughed at him for that," Hi I'm Stella, and yes I know your gender. You said that you wanted to be someone new. So why not dress as a FEMALE? You have the physique for it and the looks. You can sooooooooo pull it off. Can you at least try?"

Harry looked at the hyper Goth and mentally sighed. "Ok."

"Yay! Ok you need this, and this, and that, and also this…" she went on and on. Harry could only watch helplessly as piles of feminine clothes was put in front of him. He could not help but wonder what he has gotten into.

+*+….*+*

Harry turned around and stared. After hours where the Crazy Goth had made him try on different cloths they finally found a style he liked.

He favored the silk panties and bras, loving how they felt against his skin. The bra was padded with a small cp size due to his small frame. Stuffed in the bra was a weird rubber thing that looked like real breasts. The under garments were all white or black silk with sewed in designs.

Shorts that were tight and stopped mid thigh were bought in abundance. As well as black and red skinny jeans. He also loved longs skirts that showed off his delicate ankles. He got three pairs of shoes; a pair of white sandals, black leather boots that reached just below the knee, and a pair of purple and black high-tops. Most of his shirts were blouses with some type of design, but there were some nice looking graphic tees that hugged him in all the right places.

He bought multiple accessories too. Chains and ribbon belts. Pendants, bracelets, and earrings. Even small over the shoulder bags.

All together his style was a mixed of formal and casual.

"Th…thanks you. This means so much to me." Harry told her. Overwhelmed with how HOT AND CUTE he looked.

"Don't mention it. Just be sure to put this concealer on your scar. Oo... wait." She left to fish around out back. "Here let me put this on." On his neck she put on a black and silver chocker with a golden phoenix broach in the middle." There that aught to hide your Adam's apple."

Harry looked again in the mirror. If he didn't already know he was a guy he would think he was a girl. "It's perfect."

"Now before you leave you have to make a new name for yourself."

Harry thought. He decided to take a little of all three of his parents; his mother, his father, and the only father figure he had, his Godfather. "My new name is Esmeralda Jamie Black."

TBC

(Hello again. I just want to say…I love this story. I am sorry for those that want to get on with this but I just have to make sure the story is the best it can be. Moonlitcat out!)


	3. New Chapter 3

+*+HIDDEN*+*

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or its characters. That honor belongs to J.K. Rowling.

Warnings: there will be talk of abuse. As of now nothing to graphic. Maybe later. Also this will be a snarry and there will be cross-dressing. If you don't like still read. I want your opinions. Harry will be 6 when he hooks up with Severus.

**+*+…****…****…...THE NEXT DAY****…..….…****. +*+**

As Harry tried on his new clothes for his first outing as a girl, he couldn't help but wonder what his friends would think of him now. He was wearing a peach colored blouse with a Scoop neckline with a keyhole and tie at the bottom. It had Cut-outs at the shoulders and Elbow-length sleeves with bunching at the sides. He was also wearing a light green knee length skirt with ruffles creating a spiral from hip to knee. His shoes were simple white sandals with straps part way up the ankle. (AN: he is wearing makeup but I am really bad about makeup.)

The day before at the shop, after trying on loads of clothes, Harry was surprised at how comfortable he was in them. He had looked in the mirror, and saw beauty. He couldn't help but love how the clothes made him look and feel. He'd even found a way to cover his scar with muggle makeup and a preserving charm. Today would be his first time as a girl for real.

As Harry finished applying his makeup he walked to the door. Before he walked out he had a severe case of nerves. _What if someone notices? What are they going to do? Their savior is dressed as a female .NO, they don't matter! I will deal with this if I must. Whatever happens at least I tried to have a life. _With that decided Harry left the room. Three hours later he was at the entrance to Diagon Alley.

Harry walked down the street and noticed everyone staring at him, and was a first anxious that they knew who he was. Well at least till someone came up and asked him out. After politely telling him no Harry continued on. This time he walked with confidence in himself. For the first time, people were staring, not because of the fact that he out of his family is alive, but because he looked good. The desired him.

There was a certain freedom as a girl. As he stopped to talk to people, he relised it. He could be himself. For the first time he could show people who he is. Harry didn't know if he could explained it well himself. Harry didn't care that he was not really a girl. This persona is more him than **Harry Potter **was anyway. Always having to hide how Slytherin he was and how he felt about things like the war and light and dark magic. To him everything is equal, magic, people, and beliefs. He would save the life of a Death Eater as much as an Order member. He loved helping people, and nothing anyone tried to do would change that.

He even agreed with what Tom Riddle originally tried to do. Tom, not Voldemort, wanted Muggle-born's to have separate classes when they first entered the wizarding world so they could catch up with purebloods. Also he wanted constant monitoring on their home-life's so abuse wouldn't happen. He wanted to start up orphanages in the wizarding world for the orphans and muggle-born's that were taken from abusive homes. Sadly Tom died in madness, and the creature Voldemort was born.

As Harry neared Gringots, he could not help but wonder what he would tell the goblins. How do you tell creatures of magic that you suddenly wanted to dress like the opposite gender? Because Harry didn't think 'Hi I'm Harry Potter and I love how wearing a dress makes me feel' would cut it.

As Harry walked over to a goblin at the teller desk thingy (AN: please don't be mad I'm not good at describing some stuff.) he was surprised to recognize the goblin. "Griphook?" Harry could tell the goblin was surprised. The being narrowed his eyes at him/her, trying to place the human.

When Griphook's eyes widened fractionally Harry knew he'd figured out who he was." Mr. Potter! Why are you dressed like that?" harry was surprised to hear the surprise in the goblin's voice. They are usually such emotionless things.

"I wanted to disappear while keeping my life." Harry said simply.

"Of course, now why are you here?" Griphook asked Harry.

"Well I want to get emancipated, so I can have full control of my accounts, assets, and other such stuff." Harry silently told the Goblin as they walked to the back rooms.

"Well for that top happen we'd have to see if you have the ability to go through the magical inheritance when it's not your Birthday. Most wizards/witches can't because they don't have enough power." Griphook explained.

The goblin led Harry down the hallway. Harry was in awe of the detailed carvings portraying battle, love, story, or nature scenes. The rock walls seemed to move as the scenes reenacted themselves. "What do you mean 'magical inheritance'?" harry questioned the goblin.

"When ever a wizard/witch reaches the age of adulthood they go through magical maturity. During that blocks on your powers disappear and you gain your full powers." Griphook explained. "Now when that happens depending on how powerful your family and you are, you gain a magical inheritance. The powers passed down by blood. Today we are going to use an inheritance potion, and then we will induce magical maturity"

They entered a huge cavern like room with a desk in the middle. Griphook led harry to the desk and had him sit down. Sitting across from harry Griphook pulled out a parchment of paper and a vial full of clear liquid with a swirl of gold in the middle" now I need one drop of blood," harry allowed him to prick his figure "Thank you."

After the goblin mixed the blood and dumped it on the paper, words appeared.

_**Inheritance of Harrison James Potter**_

_**Slytherin = Parlselmagic and elemental water + air **_

_**Hufflepuff= wand-less magic and empathic abilities **_(AN: think Jasper from Twilight. FYI may favorite character in that book.)

_**Gryffindor = multi-animagus and "PEACE SPAEKER" abilities**_

_**Potter= Wings**_

_**Evens= mind magic**_

_**Black= Black magic**_

Harry could tell the goblin was surprised. Who wouldn't be? Even he was surprised. He expected the Potters, but he wasn't aware of the other ones. He didn't even Know Sirius had Blood adopted him.

"Well Mr. Potter. That was certainly interesting. An inheritance like that I wouldn't be surprised at you already showing signs of these powers. Have you?"

Harry thought back and relised that the amazing things he could do where his inheritance seeping through early. "Yes. Wand-less magic, multi-animagus, and Parseltongue. I've never tried Parlselmagic." Harry replied to Griphook's question. Harry was feeling something weird, a good and a bad feeling all at ounce, about finding out about the Black inheritance. He was sad that Sirius never got a chance to tell him.

"Ok. Now follow me." Harry silently followed the goblin to another room, this one covered in glowing blue symbols. After being directed to the very middle Griphook spoke again "you might want to take off your clothes for this" he waited a moment while a super-duper pink Harry Potter took of his clothes. "Now this will hurt. Before I start, what name will you take? Last name I mean?"

Harry thought about it and knew there was only one choice. "I'm going to take the name of the only father I knew. The man who blood-adopted me. Black."

"Ok, Good choice. Your title will be LORD HARRISON SIRIUS BLACK. You will be lord of Slytherin, Hufflepuff, Gryffindor, Black, Potter, and Evens. Now I will begin" Griphook started to talk in and indistinguishable language. Gobbledygook. The room started to glow a multitude of colors that all converged on one point. Harry.

Harry dropped to his knees as a terrible pain hit him. His body felt like it was ion fire. Harry could do nothing but sit and ride out the pain. One thought going through his mind was; _what the fuck was I thinking! Crap this hurts._ Harry hardly noticed when he started to understand the Gobbledygook. All he felt was pain. Until there was nothing but black.

TBC

(AN: geez { wipes sweat of forehead} Chapter three rewrite done. I am having such a hard time with this so the story is good. For those of you who read the original four chapters thanks for the support. This story is a joy to write and rewrite. Please review some more.)


	4. New Chapter 4

+*+HIDDEN+*+

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or its characters. That honor belongs to J.K. Rowling.

Warnings: there will be talk of abuse. As of now nothing, to graphic. Maybe later. Also this will be a snarry and there will be cross-dressing. If you don't like still read. I want your opinions. Harry will be 16 when he hooks up with Severus. One other thing, please excuse my late updates. My computer is malfunctioning.

***ANY OTHER ENGISH***

+*+…*+*

Harry was suspended in a thick darkness. No light was to be seen any where. He hung there in a state of limbo. Suddenly out of the darkness walls materialized that was pure white. In a circle around the room, six flames where floating around the air. One was ebony black, gold, there was an orange and white one, a silver one, a yellow one, and an ocean blue one. One corner of the room was blackened and rotting. As he sat there colors bled into he walls. Emerald green, a ruby red, and royal purple.

Harry was in his mindscape. The colors represented his powers that he had and the ones on the walls he had already unlocked. His wandless magic (royal purple), Parseltongue (emerald green), and multi-animagus abilities (ruby red) are three of the powers he uses. Ebony black was Black Magic, Gold was peace speaker (AN: he can talk to any creature be it goblin or bug), orange and white was wings, the silver was elemental, the yellow was empathic abilities, and the blue was mind magic.

Harry had no real thoughts that he shouldn't be here or that this was not normal. All he knew was that he needed to get rid of the rotting on his walls. Focusing his mind he attacked the rotting. Slowly it disappeared. The moment that happened, the flames spun around faster than the eye could see. The colors burst out and bled into his walls. They merged together.

+*+…**SEVERUS'S POV**…*+*

Severus slowly woke up. Looking around he saw that he had passed out on his couch. As much as he hated to have to get up, Severus had to see the goblins about an account mishap. It seemed that someone was dipping into his vaults. He had to go here to block access to it.

Tiredly making his way to his room, Severus looked through his wardrobe. He chose black slacks and a white tee. He wore elegant dress shoes and his hair tied back in a black ribbon. He put on his customary robes over the outfit, and his look was complete.

He strode out of his quarters and made his way to the entrance hall. Paintings were still sleeping in there frames, and a morning chill wafted through the halls. The only sound was Severus's footfalls echoing on the walls.

"Severus, my boy. Can you hold on for a moment?" the voice rang through the quit halls.

Turning around Severus saw the Headmaster standing at the foot of the grand staircase. _Dear god, _Severus thought _what the hell does he want. _"Of course Headmaster." Severus said reluctantly.

"Severus I hope you have some new concerning our missing tool?" the statement was posed as both a question and an order. The very fact that the missing tool was none other than the Potter boy stirred uncomfortable feelings in the pit of his stomach.

"No. the Dark Lord is looking just as frantic as you and has just as much progress." Before Albus could speak up again Severus interrupted. "If you could excuse me I have urgent business to attend."

Without waiting for an answer he left the castle and hurried to the gates. As he exited the wards, Severus apparated strait to the entrance of Diagon Alley and headed to Gringots bank.

(AN: I was going to stop the chapter here. But since I'm nice I won't. I'll let them meet in this chapter.)

**+*+….HARRY'S POV….*+***

Harry woke up in a warm, soft bed. The room was plain with beige walls and furniture. Sitting up, Harry noticed he no longer had his glasses on but could see better than ever.

He looked to the door when it opened and an elderly goblin walked into the room. ***HELLO, PLEASE TELL ME ARE YOU FEELING ANY DISCOMFORT, PAIN, OR DIZZINESS?***

***NO*** Harry replied softly. He felt bad because he couldn't tell the gender of the goblin, and didn't know how to ask.

***SO GRIPHOOK WAS RIGHT.*** THE Goblin murmured to itself. ***STAY HERE WHILE I GO GET GRIPHOOK.*** with that the goblin left the room.

While it was gone Harry got out of bed and walked over to a full length mirror. What he saw caused him to gasp in shock. His hair, while was pretty long, now fell down to his arse. It a beautiful black that looked to reflect different colors in the light. His hips and waist have also become even more feminine. He looked more filled out as well, healthy even. His face looked the same, yet his eyes where like a mixed turquoise and emerald green. All his scars are gone.

The most shocking change would have to be the fine silver, gold, and white wings. They looked like dragon wings and they scales were gold with silver swirls on them. The white part was the delicate skin that was the wing. If he moved as well he saw that the scales went down his spine as well as on his sides under arms and stomach.

"Well Mister Potter, how do you like your new look?" Before harry answered he continued on, "Well your powers are pretty easy to interpret. For Slytherin you have Parseltongue and magic which is stronger than Latin based spells, as well as control of the elements water and air. For Gryffindor you have multi-animagus abilities and Peace speaker; allows you to speak any language and understand what you hear. Hufflepuff is wandless magic and empathy abilities. You can feel the emotions around you and impact them a bit. The Potter's grew wing. The Evan's were masters of the mind arts; legilimency and occlumency, you can basically also cure any madness of the mind. Finally the blacks had something called Black Magic. Better known as Shadow Magic, the manipulations of shadows. The only difference is the Black flame which is as potent as Fiendfyre, but controllable."

Harry was shocked. This, this, he was even more powerful than he could imagine. He would have no trouble with taking out the Old Goat and Snake Face.

"There is one more thing. Due to the amount of power you have you will have a mate to ground you. The moment you touch you will feel complete. It is important that you stay in close contact with your mate. Under no circumstances are you to leave your mates side till you bond emotionally, mentally, and finally physically." The grave voice of the Goblin convinced Harry of the severity of the situation.

Harry did not know how he would deal with a mate. He'd already had a crush on a man since his first class with him. Despite his harsh treatment, Harry couldn't help but love and trust Severus Snape. Everything about the man drew harry to him. His striking features, silky ebony hair, and deep black obsidian eyes. Or his voice of rich velvet chocolate. The way the man stalks like a panther, graceful and predatorily, never fails to make him shiver with lust and desire. Harry knew he was not lucky enough to have that, that Sex God as a mate.

"Am I good to go now," Harry softy asked.

Griphook stared intently into his face. The goblin noted the heartbroken and hopeful light in his eyes. Yes, you can go. And good luck with your mate.

Harry slowly dressed as Esmeralda Black; his female persona. Sadly he left the room and proceeded to exit Gringots bank.

TBC

(AN: sorry I was going to have Severus and harry meet this chapter, but alas it was not to be. The chapter was just too long. Also I want to know, do you want harry to stay as Esmeralda, and tell Sev only that he is a male dressed as a female, and have Severus discover his true identity later? Or have Harry go right out and tell him he His Harry Potter now Black right away? **PLEASE REVIEW! I NEED TO KNOW WHAT YOU WANT!**)


	5. Chapter 5

+*+**HIDDEN***+*

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or its characters. That honor belongs to J.K. Rowling.

Warnings: there will be talk of abuse and rape. Also this will be a snarry and there will be cross-dressing. If you don't like still read. I want your opinions. Harry will be 16 when he hooks up with Severus. Now possible Mpreg.

(AN: ok so I will have Sev aware that Harry is not who he looks like. He will NOT know that he is Harry…Yet. =^-^=

***ANY OTHER LANGUAGE THAN ENGISH***

+*+…*+*

Sevres made his way up the stone steps of Gringots Bank, not paying any particular attention to were he was going. Because of this he failed to see the beauty he'd attempted to run over.

"Owwwww! What the hell, stupid Prick." The young lady muttered. Severus stared at the young thing he'd knock to the ground. She had long black hair that reflected the light in different colors. Her eyes were an expressive green and Turquoise. The thing that stood out most though was the beautiful gold silver and white wings. "Um… are you going to help me up?" a voice broke through his thoughts.

"Um… what? Oh… Yes right." Severus reached down and picked up the delicate hand to pull her to his chest. The moment they touched lights swirled in their heads, and their bodies and spirits seemed to open up and accept the other.

For Severus the feeling was…indescribable. The joy and happiness that filled him was unlike he had ever felt before. He knew that this young man would be with him forever. _Wait… man?_ _Were the hell did that come from?_ Severus carefully monitored the feeling that came from the new bond between him and the girl…man. Whatever. The feeling was strong like iron and wild. It was sweet and shy and bold and seemed to contradict itself with every turn. Despite that it was defiantly masculine.

Severus came back to himself to see that some time has passed and that his new mate was knocked out in his arms. _Oh bother. Now how am I to conduct my business?_

+*+ …..**HARRY'S POV**…*+*

Harry came back to himself warm and comfortable. He shifted slightly and burrowed deep into the warmth surrounding him. The warmth vibrated and a deep rumble filled his ear. "You know, I am not a blanket." The warmth said, voice silky smooth. Oh… how he loved Severus. Wait.

Harry opened his eyes and looked up. Deep obsidian pools met his gaze. Harry traced the lines of the man's face with his eyes. The sharp cheek bones and prominent nose. His soft lips. Those very same lips that were lifting at the corners. _He's smiling, Severus is smiling._ Harry smiled back in contentment. The feel of his mate's…_no way! Severus is my Mate!_

Harry abruptly pushed off of Severus to land on the ground. "oomph!" he looked up again and stared at Severus in horror. He was laughing! What type of evil was this? *gulp* "uh…? Where are we?" Harry asked once he'd gotten a hold of himself enough to look around.

The room was quite large with dark red-brown walls. It mixed and blended nicely with the black wooden furniture; Victorian king sized bed, desk, dresser, in table, and wardrobe. There was a red and brown Aztec carpet and green coverings, shades, and curtains. It gave off a woodsy feeling.

"My rooms. It was a struggle getting you in here without the goat finding us." The monotone voice of his mate brought Harry's attention back to him. _Goat? _"Anyway, can you explain exactly what you did at Gringots?" Severus commanded more than asked.

Harry shivered. _Fuck…that voice "_um… you see I have enough magical power that I require someone to ground me. My magic seems to have chosen you to be my life mate. I can't leave your side. At least not until we consummate the bond." Harry paused. "I think. I wasn't really paying attention."

A silence descended over the both of them. An awkward silence. Well, awkward for Harry. Harry fidgeted slightly as the silence grew. "Well," his mate's voice startled him into jumping slightly. "First off _**you**_ are going to research into grounding mate bonds. Then we must decide how to go on." Severus paused, seemingly thinking deeply. "We can't let you fall into the goat's hands because then he'll use you like the Potter brat."

"Okay." Harry whispered. _The goat was using me? I had my suspicions, especially after what happened at the end of school. But to have it confirmed… and by Severus no less._ Harry silently stood up to leave the room…

"Wait." Harry looked curiously at the man still on the bed. _SHIT! I just realized I was laying on him in bed! NOOOOOOOOOOOO! _ "I know you are a man" Severus continued talking despite the Harry's tensing, "But can you tell me your name?" Severus stared intently at the winged cross-dresser.

Harry thought about that. There were quite a few reasons to keep his identity a secret; A) Severus could get to know the real him B) he wouldn't be automatically rejected and C) he could try to figure it out for himself. He didn't even consider the second option. So decision decided.

"I won't tell you who I was. You figure it out for yourself." Severus stared darkly at the serious young man, "I want you to see me and not the preconceived notions of me." The glare being sent his way softened minutely. "Please" he used his eyes to silently beg the older man. (AN: imagin Puss from Shrek 2. Just with Harry's eyes.)

Severus sighed. He could already tell that his young mate would have him wrapped around his figure. "Okay" he said softly.

Harry let out a breath he didn't know he was holding. "Thanks. You can call me Esmeralda Black."

With that the young cross-dresser left the room.

TBC

(AN: so how was this. Shorter than usuall. But HEY… they met.)


	6. Chapter 6

**+*+HIDDEN*+***

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or its characters. That honor belongs to J.K. Rowling.

Warnings: there will be talk of abuse and rape. Also this will be a snarry and there will be cross-dressing. If you don't like still read. I want your opinions. Harry will be 16 when he hooks up with Severus. Now possible Mpreg.

(AN: ok so I will have Sev aware that Harry is not who he looks like. He will NOT know that he is Harry…Yet. All he knows is that Esmeralda is a cross-dressing male so to prevent confusion I will be using male pronouns to describe from Harry's POV and female from everyone else's.

=^-^=)

`_thoughts`_

"speaking"

***Parseltongue***

_Reading/written word_

***ANY OTHER LANGUAGE THAN ENGISH**

*+*+….…..…*+*

Harry shook slightly as he exited Severus's rooms. Now that he was away from his mate, old fears started to descend upon Harry's mind. Harry fell down to rest on his knees on the ground. His mind slowly went over everything that happened. Harry's eyes start to tear up. Wondering if Severus will leave him, wishing for it to not happen, but knowing it will.

'_What if he hates me for what _and who _I am? How can anyone love a worthless freak? What will I do?'_ Harry's thoughts were panicked and bordering on hysteria.

Tears fell down his face. In his mind, he was a freak who no one could love. That was what family had consistently told Harry for as long as the young man could remember. Even if he wasn't, wouldn't the Headmaster care for him? If he was really worth being taken care of Harry wouldn't be in a situation like this, with a family who hates him and the Headmaster out to get him.

For Harry, the idea that Severus could leave him was terrifying. Even though they had only been mates for a small amount of time, not even a day, Harry was already looking forward to living with the older man. Thinking about how life could be with his new mate caused Harry to slowly calm down, the panic subsiding. He so wanted that future in his head, with children, no war, and his mate by his side.

Slowly Harry picked himself up from his position on the ground. His walk was a little unsteady as he walked down the hallway. He should probably start on Severus's advice to search the library for info on their situation. At the end of the hallway, Harry looked around at the living area of his Mate's rooms.

His mates living area was just a bit smaller than the Gryffindor common room, with a door right across from where he was standing, a kitchen on the right, and two doors on the left. The furniture was done in red and brown tones and the décor was in shades of green. In front of a warm fire sat black leather chair that looked well used. It gave the impression of many nights spent sitting in front of the fire. Looking into the kitchen Harry noticed that it was well stocked in Muggle appliances. A surprise that Harry greatly appreciated, he had never learned to cook the wizarding way.

The entire atmosphere was warm and inviting, homey. Harry wouldn't feel overwhelmed like he did in Dumbledore's eccentric office, or out of place like the like at the cluttered Weasley home. How surprising that the only place the young man felt comfortable was in the home of his ex-most hated potions professor.

Harry went to a door on the left side of the room marked 'library' and entered. The room was a lot like the other in color theme, except for the huge bookcases filled with tons of books. In a corner, was a large table with three leather chairs. Notes and diagrams littered the area. All the books on the shelves were well worn and used. Dust was suspiciously absent from the room as well.

_`Severus must care for and love books` _Harry loved that he was seeing something new about his mate, even if it was just that Severus enjoyed books.

Harry quietly browsed the shelves and ran callused fingers over the soft leather, he read the distinctive lettering on each book. All seemed handwritten with varying styles and colors. The scent of old yet crisp parchment filled Harry's senses has he studied the tomes. It steadied him and reminded Harry of hours spent studying with Hermione. A couple caught his eye. They were side by side and a bright red color with lovely silver lettering. One title was _Mates of the Soul_ and the other's was _The Laws and Guidelines to a Modern Mated Couple. _

Retreating to the table, Harry started to read the books. He started on the second, which was very informative yet read like an official document. It was also huge and boring! He skimmed over most of it. When it started to mention what the mates were allowed he tuned in.

_All schools, businesses, government employees, legal entities, and so on must respect the bond between mates. It is a sacred practice enforced by the entity Magic and is to be respected. If one mate is in school, both mates are by law to be given personal lodgings on school grounds. If one of the pair is a teacher, the other will be given leave to live on site with the teacher. In the case of on older mate and a younger mate, allowances will be awarded for the younger to complete schooling. If one mate is a criminal, he/she must be charged with house arrest. Steps to divide mates is liable to be punished by death or what is the preferred choice of the dominate/elder mate. Interfering in a mate bond will lead to the same. _

_These laws were enacted by Lord Salazar Slytherin, at the beginning of the government seen today, to better protect those bound by magic. Punishments will be specified in accordance to law 67 paragraph C dash 3. _

The second book was better and explained about the different types of mates, matings, and rituals. The book was about thirty chapters long, and looked to be thinner than the other, but thicker than most. Every few pages showed extremely detailed diagrams and hand painted illustrations. He finally found what he was looking for on the last chapter of the book. The chapter was only four paragraphs long, as if there was not a lot to say about it.

_Mates of magic and soul are literally magic's gift towards her suffering children and also some of the rarer, most coveted types of mating. Few are powerful enough to warrant a pairing with someone to help ground them, and even fewer also need to have a mate. The mating ritual is based on how present magic is in a person as well as how much She (magic) believes her child needs a mate._

_At first touch both mates are engaged, bonded, recognized by Magic herself, and none can abject._ _The mates are matches, partners if you will, of the soul, magic, and mind. Both partners __complement each other__ in many ways. One is always more mature, protective, and guiding than the other. While the other, usually the sub or bearer, who is the most powerful, also has a history of many types of abuse. __This is expected because this type of joining helps heal. __This is Magic's way of helping her child in the only way allowed.__ Worst cases have been sexual abuse._

_The moment of meeting, most physiological problems __from all abuses, even rape, disappear__ during the time when the sub is unconscious. After the first touch the magic of the witch or wizard attempts to ready the sub for the eventual consumption of the bond. Consumption allows the mates to share magic, and in some cases build a psychic link, slowing them to share thoughts. The memories from both the muscles as well as those held by the mind disappear. The sub still knows that he/ is an abuse survivor, but the memory of all previous attacks is fuzzy and vague. Magic's way of best protecting the mind of her child. As time goes on, with close proximity towards the Dom, scars left over from the verbal and physical abuse disappear as well._

Harry dropped the book in surprise. He hadn't even realized that he'd never panicked when Severus touched him. The other night the young mate could only remember pure bliss and comfort. That had never happened; Harry had always panicked before, even with Mrs. Weasley's hugs. Never had Harry just had a break down about the verbal abuse. In the past, Harry had always panicked due to someone touching or looking at him the wrong way. He'd not even realized that verbal abuse left scars. Harry had always thought that his reactions to what people thought of him, the belief Harry had that he was a freak and unlovable, was a result of the sexual abuse.

He had to admit that he was happy he didn't have to worry about the rapes. Happy that the looming fears of another panic attack, which had always ended with him crying and vulnerable on the floor, was gone. The fear had always been there. The shame and acceptance, of what he had been told and the belief that he was weak, that to have it gone was, uplifting. No more flinching from the touch of a loved one, insane needs to scrub all his skin of his body, or thoughts that he was a whore and was dirty. Harry was free. No matter the fact that he had to deal with the other aspects of abuse, the sexual abuse was gone, as if it had never happened.

Harry couldn't help but be thankful.

+*+…...*+*

_**Severus's POV**_

Severus stared at where his young mate had been a moment before. Humored that she had such an influence on him already, that he ignored the fact she was a man. Severus was honestly ecstatic as well. Never had he had a chance like this. To fall for someone and to have his mate in turn, always be there for him. Unlike Lily were a simple word drove her away.

The potions master had never had the greatest of childhoods and never believed that his adult life would be any different. He had always been treated as scum, by his father, peers, and even some of his students, so Severus had started to believe it as well. Everyone he had in his life, only cared about the man for what he could do, or cared as long as it didn't get them killed. Esmeralda gave him hope. The hope that he was more than what Severus was taught to believe.

The potions master was walking on cloud nine as he went to change into some comfortable clothes more suited to home than the stiff clothes Severus was wearing from his morning trip to Gringotts. It wasn't until he had finished that reality came crashing down.

His dear mate was sure to be in danger.

Severus had two Masters, and both would do anything to keep him from happiness. One sane and manipulative and the other a brilliant sociopath, yet both controlled his life. Each man knew that Severus played both sides, and it was due to his skills as a potions master that the man had not met an early death. If they found out about her, they would surely take advantage of the new way to control Severus.

_`I have to do something about those two men. The only way to do that would be to find the Potter boy. Damn it all!_ Severus wanted nothing to do with that damn boy.

Potter was a brat with no regards to rules and followed the headmaster like a fucking bunny after a carrot. Even James, the boy's father, was the same, always doing what the Headmaster said so he could get away with more and have more. Not to mention all the poor girls he had probably left in the wake of his….exploits.

_`The Fucking-Boy-Who-__Lived__._Severus sneered in his head _That boy for too long now had__ a whipping coming to him __and I hope that I am there__ to see it. _

Nothing the Potter spawn could do would change Severus's mind. It didn't matter that the boy was always quite outside of his dungeons, or that no one had come forth with proof of being with him. All Severus knew was that the boy looked like a carbon copy of James Potter and that he could recognize Potter anywhere (AN: Hahahaha. Anyone get that?)

To protect his precious happiness, Severus would have to find the brat and get Potter to take life seriously. `_Stupid brat. `_

Pissed off, Severus stalked out of his room to join his Little Mate. Looking around, he saw the door to his library open. He found her in one of his Favorite corners of the library. The irate potions master smiled a bit at the sight of Esmeralda, he calmed at seeing that she was safe.

Walking over, Severus saw Esmeralda standing over a book with a shell-shocked look on her face. Worried, he hurried over to her faster. Severus was worried when Esmeralda didn't acknowledge him, her expression far away.

Picking up the book, Severus read the page she was on in hopes to discover was sent his mate into this state. What he read made him see red. During the point of first touch, he had felt her mind changing. The only explanation would be that Esmeralda had been … had been raped.

'_Who the FUCK touched my mate?_'

Severus took a moment to collect his anger; it wouldn't do to scare her. Not if they were going to spend their lives together or if Severus ever wanted Esmeralda to talk to him at all. The way that he handled this now would greatly affect how she acted towards the older man the rest of their lives.

"Esmeralda, pray tell, who was the fucking scumbag… that harmed you?" his voice, surprisingly, was calm.

Harry looked at his mate and thought, '_oh fuck._'

+*+…*+*

_TBC_


	7. Chapter 8

**+*+HIDDEN*+***

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or its characters. That honor belongs to J.K. Rowling.

Warnings: there will be talk of abuse and rape. Also this will be a snarry and a cross-dressing fic. Harry will be 16 when he hooks up with Severus. Possible Mpreg.

(AN: Hello Loyal Readers! I must say that I'm surprised to be back so early. Its like a little past midnight and suddenly….BAM! The next chapter is in my head. I literally could NOT wait for tomorrow. Just to remind you, Harry as Esmeralda will be known as 'her' in anyone's POV who isn't Harry or doesn't know that he is Harry. =^-^=

Also dear readers...I HAVE A BETA! Yay! Thank-you everyone who volunteered, i appreciated it. Now, on with the story)

`_thoughts`_

"speaking"

***Parseltongue***

_Reading/written word_

***ANY OTHER LANGUAGE THAN ENGISH***

*+*+….…..…*+*

Harry couldn't help but panic slightly of the appearance of his mate. In the aftershock of the question Harry's thoughts ran wild. _ 'What would Severus think if he knew? What can I say without revealing the details of my past that will lead to him discovering my true identity? For that matter, how will Severus react to finding out I'm Harry Potter?'_

Harry gazed at his older mate trying to control his thoughts but the winged male's panic kept building. Despite the fact that Harry wasn't as mentally scarred by his past as before, the younger man couldn't help but fear that if Severus was aware of his freakish past then the older man would walk out, leaving Harry alone and abandoned. '_How can I answer?_ _I wouldn't survive if he left._'

Scenarios of what would happen if Severus found out the truth filled Harry's head. The future pain that was sure to come bled through from what Harry believed to be the future into the present. An ache steadily started to fill Harry's chest as his thoughts grew darker and darker.

"Well." The dark voice of his mate pulled Harry out of his thoughts.

"I-I don't want to talk about it." Harry moved away from the table, and consequently, his mate in a bid to put more space between them. Hearing a growl behind him, the young cross-dresser started to turn before his hand was grabbed and Harry was yanked into Severus' strong arms.

The feeling of safety and contentment that those arms gave Harry, allowed him to relax slightly. Slowly the raven's thoughts calmed and his troubles seemed to melt away. Secured and held gently yet solidly to his mate's defined chest, Harry couldn't have been happier. The last shades of panic subsided as Severus' reassuring heartbeat pulsed under Harry's hand.

"Love," Severus' voice rumbled in Harry's ear sending pleasant shocks shooting down the young man's back. "You need to talk about this, you have to trust me. I am your mate; nothing you will tell me could cause me to leave you."

Harry glanced up into Severus' eyes and was lost; the older man's dark orbs seemed to hypnotize and search out Harry's very soul pulling it out into the open for all to see. The feeling was as freeing as it was unsettling. Never before had Harry had such a feeling of intimacy, and for it to have come from a look was mindboggling. Everything was new, amazing, scary, and so natural that Harry got lost in the chaotic energies of his mind and soul. The only thing he was sure of, though, was the tether that grounded him; his mate.

Despite the voice in his mind warning him that this was a bad idea, Harry nodded. He will put his trust in Severus, cause to not do so hurt too much.

+*+…...SNAPE'S POV…...+*+

Severus could see the dizzying amount of emotions that played in Esmeralda's eyes from his question. The pain and fear were so powerful that Severus was sure he could feel them as well.

The older man watched as his little mate panicked and tried to escape from the situation. The fear of losing his precious one caused the dark male to snarl as he quickly grabbed his mate, weary of her wings, and pulled Esmeralda to him. Weary of Esmeralda leaving, of running away caused Severus to tighten his arms around her, preventing her from escape. Severus held his mate securely in his arms till she calmed, placing her hand over his heart.

"Love," Severus spoke to his skittish mate "You need to talk about this, you have to trust me. I am your mate; nothing you will tell me could cause me to leave you." Through whatever may come, Severus was in no doubt that his place was at her side; as her shield and her blanket, her lover and friend. Esmeralda was his to protect, his to cherish, and to keep her he will endure anything. '_Nothing will chase me from her side; nothing she does, says, or believes she has earned.'_

Esmeralda looked up and searched his eyes for any hint of…well Severus didn't really know what. Severus held his breath as he waited for his little one to respond. If she rejected him, Severus feared how he would survive. Having tasted the hope of love, of family, the very thought of it being taken away was…..was too horrible for words.

The moment Esmeralda nodded her head and agreed to trust him, Severus released a breath, placing his forehead on her shoulder as relief filled him. His releif was so uplifting, that Severus felt as if he was the one with wings.

Turning and nuzzling his mate's neck, Severus whispered his thanks. "I'll never betray you my love" placing a kiss under her ear he nearly smiled when his actions caused his Esmeralda to quiver in his arms. "I swear."

TBC

(AN: short chapie. Next one will be longer)


End file.
